#331 November 27.

#331 November 27.

I wanted so badly to walk up to her, and tell her, “you are beautiful”.
But for some reason, I just couldn’t do it.

Just walk
right up to her, and say, “you are beautiful”. Just say
three words. What is so hard about that? Chances are very low she’d
hit me or something. Why can’t I do it?

I wanted to do it, very badly. But I couldn’t do it. Something else,
inside me, was scared, of what I have no idea, even though I have
been analyzing this for years now. I just couldn’t go up to her and
say three words.

I was so pissed off at myself, I was shoving people out of my way left
and right, to get out the door, into my car, and off to home. Home,
where I need not be afraid, no, not afraid. Just alone.



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